בס”ד
1. When you realize you’ve done something wrong, what happens next? Do you tend to feel guilty, justify what you did, try to repair the damage, or simply move on?
Follow-up: Is feeling guilty necessarily a good thing? Can guilt sometimes prevent a person from changing?
What we’re exploring: The difference between guilt, remorse, responsibility, and actual repentance.
2. Can you think of something you once believed or did that you now recognize was wrong? What caused you to change your mind or behavior? Was it something someone said, an experience you had, or a realization that developed gradually?
Follow-up: Did changing your behavior change how you thought about yourself?
What we’re exploring: How moral growth actually occurs, rather than how we imagine it ought to occur.
3. What does it take for you to believe that someone who has wronged you has genuinely changed?
Is an apology enough? Do you need to see different behavior? Does it depend on how serious the wrongdoing was?
Follow-up: Can you forgive someone without trusting them again?
What we’re exploring: The distinction between repentance, forgiveness, reconciliation, and restoring trust.
4. Do you think G-d expects more from us than we are capable of doing?
When you read G-d’s warning to Cain in Genesis 4:7—that wrongdoing threatens him, but he can overcome it—does that strike you as encouraging or intimidating?
Follow-up: If we really can overcome our destructive impulses, what does that imply about our responsibility when we don’t?
What we’re exploring: Moral freedom, human limitations, and the possibility of choosing differently.
5. As a Ben Noach, have you ever wondered whether G-d’s forgiveness is available to you in the same way it is to a Jew?
Does knowing that the Torah describes G-d’s forgiveness of non-Israelites, such as the people of Nineveh, affect how you understand your relationship with Him?
Follow-up: Have your previous religious experiences influenced what you believe G-d expects from someone seeking forgiveness?
What we’re exploring: The universal availability of repentance, including assumptions that Bnei Noach may have brought from previous religious backgrounds.
6. Can a person ever completely put the past behind them?
Suppose someone sincerely regrets a serious wrong, changes their behavior, and does everything possible to make amends. Does the past still define who they are?
Follow-up: What is the difference between accepting responsibility for your past and remaining imprisoned by it?
Shabbat Shalom
By Rabbi Tani Burton
More shiurim of Rabbi Tani Burton
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