Raising Responsible Human Beings

We live in an age of unprecedented education. Children learn mathematics, science, languages and technology. They are taught to express themselves, defend their rights and pursue success.

But are we teaching them how to become human beings?

A person can graduate knowing how to make a living, yet not know how to live. He may know how to advance himself, but not how to control himself; how to demand respect, but not how to show it; how to explain his feelings, but not how to overcome them.

The purpose of education cannot merely be to produce successful adults. It must produce menschen: people of conscience, responsibility, humility and moral courage.

Are Children Born Good?

Every educational system begins with a view of human nature.

Much of modern educational thinking assumes that the child’s natural self is fundamentally good, and that harmful behaviour arises mainly through society, circumstances or poor nurture. Therefore, the adult’s task is primarily to affirm the child, protect his self-expression and avoid suppressing his natural desires.

The Torah begins elsewhere. Iyov says: “A wild donkey is born a man.”¹

This does not mean that a child is evil. Every human being is created b’tzelem Elokim, in the image of G-d.² But Divine potential is not the same as developed character.

A baby naturally experiences the world through his own needs. He does not need to be taught to demand, to take or to say “mine.” He must be taught to wait, share, give thanks and recognise that other people also matter.

That is not a defect. It is the beginning of human life. But it must not remain its final stage.

The task of chinuch (= childrens education) is to transform instinct into character, desire into duty and potential into lived goodness. Chinuch does not crush the child’s personality; it trains the child to become master of it.

Without such education, the child may grow physically, intellectually and professionally while remaining emotionally infantile—an older and more sophisticated version of the baby who believes that everyone else exists to satisfy him.

Korach’s Greatness—and His Failure

This is the deeper tragedy of Korach.

Korach was not an ignorant or spiritually insensitive person. He belonged to Kehat, the family entrusted with transporting the holiest vessels of the Mishkan. The Torah warns that they could not touch or gaze improperly upon the sacred objects, lest they die.³ Such service demanded extraordinary discipline and
reverence.

Korach was also wise and possessed ruach hakodesh (= Divine spirit). Rashi explains that he foresaw that Shmuel HaNavi and twenty-four divisions of distinguished descendants would emerge from him. The Sages therefore ask: “Korach was a wise man; what caused him to act so foolishly?” They answer: “His eye
deceived him.”⁴

He saw something true but interpreted it through his ego. Korach could see generations into the future, yet could no longer see himself honestly. He mistook the greatness that would come from him for proof that his present ambition was justified.

This teaches us that intelligence alone does not make a person moral. Spiritual experience does not guarantee humility. A person can carry the holy ark while still carrying an unrefined ego.

Potential Is Not Achievement

Korach confronted Moshe and Aharon:

“The entire congregation is holy, and G-d is among them. Why do you raise yourselves above the congregation of G-d?”⁵

His first statement was true. Every Jew possesses holiness. His conclusion was false.

Korach confused equal dignity with identical roles, and holiness in potential with holiness fully revealed. He assumed that because holiness existed within everyone, no one required leadership, structure or authority.

The Rebbe explains that this misunderstands true leadership. A leader does not create the people’s holiness; he reveals it. The people possessed G-dly potential, but repeatedly failed to live according to it. Moshe’s responsibility was to awaken, guide and develop what lay within them.⁶

Korach saw a leader as a referee—someone standing above others, identifying violations and exercising power. Moshe was a coach.

A referee asks: “Which rule did you break?” A coach asks: “What must you learn so that you can succeed?”

A referee reacts after the mistake. A coach prepares the person before it, guides him through it and helps him grow after it. This is the task of parents, educators, judges and leaders. They must enforce boundaries when necessary, but their ultimate purpose is not to catch people doing wrong. It is to develop people
capable of choosing right.

A Story of the Rebbe

During the Second World War, dozens of Jewish children were living in an orphanage in Marseille. Many had lost their parents or did not know whether they were still alive. Food was scarce, and the children were hungry and despondent.

In the summer of 1941, a mysterious man began arriving with bread, sardines, tuna and sometimes potatoes. The children knew him only as “Monsieur.”

He did not simply leave the food and depart. He remained until every child had eaten. Some children were so traumatised that they refused food. Monsieur sat beside them on the floor, took them onto his lap, told stories, sang songs and fed them patiently by hand. He knew every child’s name, although they did not know
his.⁷

Years later, one of those children, Dovidele, entered the Rebbe’s office at 770. Before he could introduce himself, the Rebbe smiled and exclaimed, “It’s Dovidele!”

Suddenly he recognised him. The mysterious Monsieur who had fed the starving children was the future Lubavitcher Rebbe.

This story reveals the Rebbe’s greatness.

He did not only see hungry mouths. He saw broken children who needed to experience that they mattered. He did not stand at a distance and give instructions. He sat on the floor. He sang. He fed them. He restored their will to live.

That is a coach of the human soul.

The Rebbe’s greatness did not make others feel small. It enabled them to discover that they were precious and capable of becoming great themselves.

From External Referees to an Inner Conscience

Rabbi Yehudah HaNasi teaches:

“Know what is above you: an Eye that sees, an Ear that hears, and all your deeds are recorded.”⁸

Rabban Yochanan ben Zakkai blessed his students that their fear of Heaven should equal their fear of human beings. When they expressed surprise, he explained that a person committing a sin often thinks: “I hope no person sees me.”⁹

Parents cannot accompany their children everywhere. Teachers cannot observe every student.

Judges encounter wrongdoing only after it has occurred.
The goal of education must therefore be to build an inner moral authority.

The immature child asks: “Will I be caught?”

The developing child asks: “What will this choice do to me?”

The spiritually educated person asks: “What does G-d expect from me?”

This is why morality requires an authority that transcends humanity. If right and wrong are created only by society, then society can redefine them. Governments, majorities and cultures can all make grave moral errors.

The Seven Noahide Laws teach all humanity that the world is not ownerless. There is one Creator, every human being bears His image, and every person is accountable to a moral standard above power, convenience and public opinion.¹⁰

The Moment of Silence

This was the foundation of the Rebbe’s campaign for a daily Moment of Silence in every school.

At the beginning of the school day, each child should be given a quiet moment to reflect. The state need not prescribe a particular prayer. Parents should give their own children the moral and spiritual content of that silence.¹¹

A child might think:

“I was created for a purpose.” “There is a Creator above me.” “My actions matter.” “Whom can I help today?”

The Moment of Silence is not merely relaxation or mindfulness. A selfish person can sit quietly while continuing to think only about himself.

Its purpose is transcendence: to remind the child that he is valuable, but not the centre of existence; that he possesses desires, but is not a slave to them; that he can choose what is right even when no human referee is watching.

How Do We Become Good Parents?

Good parenting does not mean ensuring that a child is always happy. It means helping a child become capable of bringing goodness and happiness to others. Parents must be coaches, not merely referees.

We must model what we teach. A child learns honesty by watching whether we tell the truth when honesty costs us. He learns respect by observing how we speak to our spouse, employees and people from whom we need nothing.

We must combine love with boundaries. Love says: “You are infinitely valuable.” A boundary says: “Not everything you want is good.” Love without boundaries can produce entitlement; boundaries without love can produce fear.

We must praise character, not only achievement: “I am proud that you told the truth”; “I noticed that you included someone who was alone”; “You controlled yourself when you were angry.”

And when we are wrong, we must apologise. Authority is not weakened when a parent admits a mistake. It teaches that greatness means taking responsibility.

The Rebbe once told an educator that children do not need to be constantly reminded of their shortcomings; many are already their own harshest critics. They need to hear about their strengths and extraordinary potential.¹² But recognising potential does not mean excusing wrongdoing. A true coach says: “What you did was wrong—but it is not the whole of who you are. You were created in G-d’s image, and you are capable of better.”

The Call of Gimmel Tammuz

Gimmel Tammuz is not only a day to describe the Rebbe’s greatness. It is a day to ask what his greatness demands from us.
Korach said: “Everyone is already holy.” The Rebbe taught: “Everyone has holiness— now reveal it.”

Korach saw leadership as one person rising above others. The Rebbe taught that true leadership means raising others above themselves.

May we raise children who are not only informed but refined; not only confident but humble; not only expressive but self-controlled; not only successful but good.

May every child learn that he is seen by G-d, entrusted with a purpose and capable of becoming a true mentch. And may we fulfil the Rebbe’s vision of a world in which Jews and all humanity recognise the one Creator and live with justice, responsibility and kindness, preparing the world for the fulfilment of the
prophecy:

“The earth will be filled with the knowledge of G-d as the waters cover the sea.”¹³

By Rabbi Avriel Rabenou

    Sources and References

    1. 1. Iyov 11:12. See Metzudas David ad loc.; compare Bereishis 8:21 regarding the human inclination
      from youth.
    2. 2. Bereishis 1:27; 9:6. See Avos 3:14.
    3. 3. Bamidbar 4:4–20, especially verses 15 and 20.
    4. 4. Rashi to Bamidbar 16:7, based on Midrash Tanchuma, Korach 5; Bamidbar Rabbah 18:8.
    5. 5. Bamidbar 16:3.
    6. 6. Based on the Rebbe’s explanation of Korach’s challenge: holiness in potential requires Moshe’s
      leadership to bring it into revelation. See 5 Powerful Insights From the Rebbe—Korach, “True
      Leadership”; compare Likkutei Sichos, Vol. 28, Korach, Sichos 2–3.
    7. 7. “The Mysterious Monsieur Revealed,” testimony of Dovid Yankelevitz, Here’s My Story,
      JEM/Chabad.org.
    8. 8. Pirkei Avos 2:1.
    9. 9. Berachos 28b.
    10. 10. Bereishis 9:1–7; Sanhedrin 56a–60a; Rambam, Hilchos Melachim 8:10–11 and chapters 9–10.
    11. 11. See the Rebbe’s addresses on the Moment of Silence, especially 10 Shevat 5743 and 19 Kislev 5745;
      Sichos in English; “Society’s Great Hope: A Moment of Silence”; “Answering to a Higher
      Authority,” Living Torah.
    12. 12. Mendel Kalmenson, “A Teacher’s Manual,” recording the Rebbe’s guidance to a young educator.
      See also the Rebbe’s educational teaching that chinuch trains a child to manifest his spiritual
      potential.
    13. 13. Yeshayahu 11:9; Rambam, Hilchos Melachim 12:5.

    Likkutei Sichos Volume 28 sicha 2 & 3 support the distinction between equal sanctity and different Divine roles, and the idea that a “crown” changes identity rather than merely regulating outward behaviour. The Marseille story, the Rebbe’s counsel to educators, and the Moment of Silence details are documented by
    Chabad.org and Jewish Educational Media.

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