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STRUGGLE AND REPENTANCE

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A THOUGHT ABOUT PARSHAT KI TEITZEI 5784

In this blog we begin taking note of the Jewish laws, Deuteronomy 21:10-11, on how to deal with a captive woman.

10 When thou goest forth to battle against thine enemies, and the L-RD thy G-d delivereth them into thy hands, and thou carriest them away captive,י  כִּי-תֵצֵא לַמִּלְחָמָה, עַל-אֹיְבֶיךָ; וּנְתָנוֹ ד’ אֱלֹ’הֶקיךָ, בְּיָדֶךָ–וְשָׁבִיתָ שִׁבְיוֹ.
11 and seest among the captives a woman of goodly form, and thou hast a desire unto her, and wouldest take her to thee to wife;יא  וְרָאִיתָ, בַּשִּׁבְיָה, אֵשֶׁת, יְפַת-תֹּאַר; וְחָשַׁקְתָּ בָהּ, וְלָקַחְתָּ לְךָ לְאִשָּׁה

The text states that the Jews are instructed to go to war against their enemies, according to its simple meaning. They are encouraged to take an active stance against the enemies who wish to attack the Jewish nation, even before these enemies have struck the first blow. If a man then sees a beautiful woman from the enemy and wishes to marry her, this is allowed after a special procedure.

However, we can also view this text in a different way, drawing a practical lesson for us in this month of Elul, the month of repentance. We face a daily struggle—a struggle with our evil inclination. Our soul has been engaged in this struggle since it left its unity with G-d and came into this world. This world is full of physical temptations that distract us from our life’s mission. These temptations can lead to serious sins such as idolatry, blasphemy, murder, theft, and adultery, which we are obligated to combat.

But not only the aforementioned sins can divert us from our life’s mission. We can also engage in actions that are not forbidden, and even necessary or permissible, but which still create a separation between us and G-d and hinder us in fulfilling our life’s mission.

Take, for example, eating. Eating is, of course, not forbidden; without food, we cannot live. However, obsessively eating does not bring us closer to G-d, and anything that does not bring us closer to G-d creates distance. This reminds me of the Rabbi who ate not for the sake of eating, but to say a blessing. For him, the mitzvah of the bracha became more important than the act of eating itself, and he used eating as a means to perform the mitzvah.  Everything we do to meet our physical and material needs without spiritual depth is a lost struggle, but not the end of the war.

This applies to all our actions, words, and thoughts. Our actions, words, and thoughts are determined by our character traits. Are we quick to anger or tolerant? Are we helpful or primarily selfish? We need to work on our character traits so that they are strong enough to fulfill G-d’s will and the task He has given us.

“When you go out,” go out of your routines, go out of your entrenched habits, and evaluate them. Where they are not good, you must wage war to remove the negative elements. As it is written in

Deuteronomy 23:10:

10 When thou goest forth in camp against thine enemies, then thou shalt keep thee from every evil thing.י  כִּי-תֵצֵא מַחֲנֶה, עַל-אֹיְבֶיךָ:  וְנִשְׁמַרְתָּ–מִכֹּל, דָּבָר רָע

When you fight against what you need to combat, you will find that various unexpected things come your way. For example, when I wanted to overcome my coffee addiction, coffee was on sale, it suddenly smelled much stronger in the break room, and a friend discovered special coffee beans that were said to be less harmful. But if we battle the evil inclination, the text promises that G-d will help us achieve victory. As it is written in Deuteronomy 20:1:

1 When thou goest forth to battle against thine enemies, and seest horses, and chariots, and a people more than thou, thou shalt not be afraid of them; for the L-RD thy G-d is with thee, who brought thee up out of the land of Egypt.א  כִּי-תֵצֵא לַמִּלְחָמָה עַל-אֹיְבֶךָ, וְרָאִיתָ סוּס וָרֶכֶב עַם רַב מִמְּךָ–לֹא תִירָא, מֵהֶם:  כִּי-ד’ אֱלֹקיךָ עִמָּךְ, הַמַּעַלְךָ מֵאֶרֶץ מִצְרָיִם.

Or HaChaim explains: The word  סוס (“horse”) is a simile for the readiness of the evil urge to do battle, and the word   רכב (“chariot”) is a simile for the fact that man is composed of a variety of materials, drawn to both the profane and the sacred, instead of a single element as is his attacker, the evil urge. The words  עם רב (“numerous people”) are a hyperbole for the multitude of evil forces created by man’s sins all of which are arrayed against him in this battle.

One of those “people” is “the fear of failure.” As soon as we engage in the struggle, that little voice in our head says: do you really think you will succeed? Think about what you did before, and now you want to improve yourself; that’s just hypocritical. And there are many other “people” that want to hinder us, but G-d, who brought Israel out of Egypt, frees all people when they face spiritual oppression that impedes their spiritual growth.

We engage in the struggle, we overcome, and ultimately we bring something back “home” – a “beautiful woman”. On one hand, this woman can represent not completely giving up a worldly experience. Just as with eating, you cannot give it up entirely, but you can elevate it by making a blessing over it.

On the other hand, this woman can symbolize a new challenge. You have overcome what you wanted to overcome, but G-d gives a new challenge on a higher level. After a period of rest, a new struggle arises, just as Abraham faced ten trials in his life, each trial elevating him to a higher spiritual level.

Let us place our complete trust in Him as we confront our negative character traits, without being afraid of losing, because we read in Psalms 20: 8-10

8 Some trust in chariots, and some in horses; but we will make mention of the name of the L-RD our G-d. 9 They are bowed down and fallen; but we are risen, and stand upright. 10 Save, L-RD; let the King answer us in the day that we call.  

By Angelique Sijbolts
Thanks to Rabbi Tani Burton for the feedback
With thanks to B. Yaniger for the inspiration

Sources:

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Texts Mechon Mamre


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