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Shalom Bayit

Develop yourself to the best of your ability

One of the 7 Noahide Laws is the establishment of courts, because Hashem desires a just society. A system where the needy, the sick, the orphans are taken into account, a system where people who make a mistake are taught how to do better. A court system ensures that people agree on standard values and norms, rules of conduct with each other based on the 7 Noahide Laws, so that people can teach each other what is not right and what is unjust, but also (and perhaps especially that) what is right and just.

When there are multiple courts, it is important that they follow the same rules so that there is peace between the courts and no disagreement. When courts have the 7 Noahide Laws as their basis, things will be much easier.

Courts – as long as we do not come into contact with them – are quite far removed from the common man.

Closer to home are our Torah teachers. Peace and harmony among our teachers makes peace and harmony in our more immediate society.

All these issues – however serious the controversies – are far beyond our reach to influence.

But within our sphere of influence lies our own faith community. When we find that group members have points of contention, it is important to play a mediating role and bring back peace and harmony within the group.

But the place where we can exert the most influence is in our own homes.

The Sages taught (Tanne De’Vei Eliyahu Zootha, end of 9th perek):

If there is discord at home, the end is destruction.

Shalom Bayit – peace in the home – is the most important thing for a blessed marriage.
Shalom Bayit is so enormously important that the Torah spares no expense to achieve it between husband and wife. After all, how careful we should be not to use G-d’s Name in vain, neither in words nor in writings, how careful we should be not to erase Holy Names, but the Torah teaches that G-d’s Name itself may be erased – in bitter water – if it leads to reconciliation between husband and wife and thus to Shalom Bayit.

For a home in harmony is the basis for a healthy society, in which courts will no longer be necessary.

By Angelique Sijbolts

Sources: Sefer Shemirat HaLashon by Chafetz Chayim, Numeria 5:11-30

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